Stick that in your Santorum and smoke it

Wow. Supreme Court, you’ve officially sort of restored my faith in you:

In a landmark 6-to-3 decision announced yesterday, America’s highest court commanded the states to get out of the business of attempting to regulate what can or can’t happen within private, intimate relationships between consenting adults. Instead, five of the six majority justices ruled that Americans enjoy a fundamental right to conduct the most personal and private aspects of their lives free from the prying eyes of government officials.

Except, of course, for Scalia, the crusty old turd, but hell, what do you expect. There are a lot of really great things about this ruling, not the least of which is that not only does this invalidate state laws against “sodomy” (which invariably, in these laws, means “anything other than missionary, procreational sex,” with or without the sheet with a hole in it thrown over your woman to keep her from enjoying herself), but because of the following:

The case is significant in constitutional terms because in recognizing a fundamental right to relationship privacy, the majority justices have bolstered one of the pillars of the high court’s controversial 1973 abortion ruling. Yesterday’s decision, by finding once again that privacy in “intimate conduct” between adults is a constitutionally protected right, will make it much harder for a future court to overturn the 1973 Roe v. Wade precedent.

Vastly outvoted, Scalia had some helpful comments about how, since the majority disagreed with him, they’ve obviously “signed on to the so-called homosexual agenda.” I’ve never been quite clear on the homosexual agenda; my gay and lesbian friends and family members refuse to discuss it and regard me with suspicion when I bring it up; I can only assume this means they know that Justice Scalia and I are on to them. Either their agenda is to make everybody be gay, or else they just want to redecorate everything and to mince on public streets. I can’t tell which.

In a semi-related note, the SCOTUS sent the Nike case back to the California Supreme Court, basically declining to say all that much about it, except that they weren’t sure it was a federal issue. Draw your own conclusion.

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