I didn’t see the Oscars last night, but I watched Chris Rock’s bit this morning and so far I’m pretty impressed :

“A lot of people like to bash Bush. I’m not gonna bash Bush here tonight. I saw Fahrenheit 9/11, I think Bush is a genius. I thought Bush did some things this year, you, nobody in this room could do. Nobody in this room could pull off ok? Cause Bush basically reapplied for his job this year.

Now can you imagine applying for a job, and while you’re applying for that job, there is a movie in every theater in the country that shows how much you suck at that job?” (Laughter)

I’d be hard to get hired wouldn’t it?(Laughter)

Now I watched Fahrenheit, I learned some stuff man. Bush did some things you could never get away with at your job, man. Never, ever, ever.

When Bush got into office he had a surplus of money. Now there’s like a $70 trillion dollar deficit. Now, just imagine you worked at the Gap.(Laughter)

You’re closing out your register, and there’s $70 trillion dollars short.(Laughter)

The average person would get in trouble for something like that, right?(Laughter-Applause) Not Bush, no.

He started a war, that’s cool, support the troops, he started a war. Now just imagine you worked at the Gap.(Laughter)

You’re $70 trillion behind on your register, and then you start a war with the Banana Republic…(Laughter) ’cause you say they got toxic tank-tops over there.(Laughter)

You have the war. People are dying. A thousand Gap employees dead, that’s right, bleeding all over the khakis. (Laughter)

You finally take over Banana Republic and find out, they never made tank-tops in the first place. (Laughter-Applause)

Another thing that really struck me during the first 30 minutes or so of the awards that I did get to see was Brad Bird (who won Best Animated Feature for The Incredibles) thanked “the Disney marketing team”. That might not have stuck out to most people, but to the few of us who saw The Iron Giant in the theater and remember the way Warner Brothers killed that movie with its hideous advertising, he might as well have said “Now that I’ve got an Oscar, WB can kiss my ass”.