Maybe I’m the only person annoyed by this, but when did Salon turn into Ain’t It Cool News? Like the first half of every other article at AIC, this intro to an otherwise great interview with journalist Mark Danner feels completely out of place :

On a cloudless day, the sky a brilliant, late-afternoon blue, my car winds its way up the Berkeley hills. Plum and pear trees in glorious whites and pinks burst into sight at each turn in the road. Beds of yellow flowers, trees hung with lemons, and the odd palm are surrounded by the green of a Northern California winter, though the temperature is pushing 70 degrees. An almost perfectly full moon, faded to a tattered white, sits overhead. Suddenly, I take a turn and start straight up, as if into the heavens, but in fact toward Grizzly Peak, before turning yet again into a small street and pulling up in front of a wooden gate. You swing it open and proceed down a picturesque stone path through the world’s tiniest grove of redwoods toward the yellow stucco cottage that was only recently the home of Nobel Prize-winning poet Czeslaw Milosz, but is now the home — as yet almost furniture-less — of journalist Mark Danner, who has said that, as a young writer in search of “a kind of moral clarity,” he gravitated toward countries where “massacres and killings and torture happen, in the place, that is, where we find evil.”
. . .
We seat ourselves, a makeshift table with my tape recorders between us, and, turning away from the slowly sinking sun, simply plunge in.

Jeez, and they say bloggers are self-indulgent. Perhaps I should start writing like this too :

“It was a frigid Tuesday not unlike any other that I returned from lunch to once again sit at my desk and survey the media landscape. The browning of the leaves and the stiffness of that February wind were no match for the scalding hot cup of coffee that I brought slowly to my lips to begin warming me from inside. As I sat there checking the correspondence from friends and foes alike, I had no idea I was about to click on the link that would change my life forever. Through normally locked behind an impenetrable wall composed of 1’s and 0’s, this particular column from the New York Times would prove to catalog the failures of an Administration whose exploits would put Don Quixote to shame. Beneath the byline Krugman lies prose too good to miss my friends, so do yourselves a favor and make sure to ‘read the whole thing’.”

On second thought, if I wrote like that, I’d probably just end up wanting to kick my own ass.

It’s not as bizarre as singing “I Want To Hold Your Hand” to an octopus, but this cartoon is a lot of fun.

Why aren’t these legally available on DVD? Because like every other Beatles product, it’s all about egos and money.

Let’s face it, if al Qaeda wanted to sneak a nuclear device into a U.S. port, they probably wouldn’t have any trouble. At best, maybe ten percent of the shipping containers that arrive in this country are examined and that has barely changed since 9/11. As the Wall Street Journal pointed out, the Bush Administration’s port security budget is pathetic :

A study completed last year by the Coast Guard and the U.S. Department of Homeland Security identified 66 of the nation’s 359 ports as being especially vulnerable to terrorist attack. But while the country has spent $18 billion securing airports since the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, it has spent just $630 million to improve security at the nation’s ports. The Department of Homeland Security’s Inspector General last year sharply criticized the port-security program, saying it didn’t direct funds to the most vulnerable ports and compromised the nation’s ability to stave off terrorist attacks.
. . .
Customs is in charge of two major programs designed to prevent terrorists from smuggling weapons of mass destruction or operatives into the U.S.: the Container Security Initiative, or CSI, and the Customs-Trade Partnership Against Terrorism, known as C-TPAT. Under CSI, U.S. customs inspectors are stationed in dozens of ports around the world to review cargo manifests sent before a ship leaves port to try to flag suspect cargo for inspection overseas. Under C-TPAT, international-shipping companies voluntarily implement security measures in exchange for faster clearance through customs. The aim of the program is to secure containers before they even arrive in the U.S.

But last May, congressional investigators found that both programs were badly flawed and might actually facilitate terrorist smuggling if their deficiencies weren’t fixed. Again, the problem revolved around a lack of minimum standards for inspection equipment and an inability to verify foreign ports security efforts. In fact, only between 5% and 10% of an estimated six million containers that arrive in the U.S. every year are inspected, according to Customs and Border Protection.

So the magic number is $630 million. That’s how much the Bush Administration cares about keeping our ports safe. As a point of comparison, keep in mind that the same Administration spent $1.4 billion-with-a-B on public relations contracts over the same period. Of if you want to look at it another way, consider the $630 million over five years versus this bit from the 2006 budget :

In addition, the 2006 Budget provides support for programs that encourage responsible choices before parenthood. President Bush’s Abstinence Initiative provides grants to States and communities to develop, implement, and evaluate programs for adolescents that promote abstinence and healthy choices. Activities also advance parent education and outreach, media campaigns, and research related to abstinence education. Since 2001, 102 grantees have provided abstinence-only education services in communities nationwide. The Budget provides more than $206 million for abstinence-only activities this year.

That’s what everyone should be outraged about. The President is spending more money on telling teenagers not to have sex than he is on keeping terrorists from sneaking a nuclear device into this country.

Mr. Furley has died :

Don Knotts, the skinny, lovable nerd who kept generations of television audiences laughing as bumbling Deputy Barney Fife on “The Andy Griffith Show,” has died. He was 81.
. . .
Knotts, whose shy, soft-spoken manner was unlike his high-strung characters, once said he was most proud of the Fife character and doesn’t mind being remembered that way.

His favorite episodes, he said, were “The Pickle Story,” where Aunt Bea makes pickles no one can eat, and “Barney and the Choir,” where no one can stop him from singing.

There’s a reason his name is synonymous with “genius”. (via BoingBoing)

Make your own here.

Since dimwits like Michelle Malkin are jumping to the conclusion that liberals who are wary about the UAE ports deal somehow validate their own prejudices (as if they ever cared about our opinions anyways), here’s my question : How would a policy of scrutinizing every brown-skinned male with a funny name help us catch people like the infamous American Taliban John Walker Lindh :

…or Oklahoma City bomber Terry Nichols :



…or Chechen suicide bomber Zulikhan Yelikhadzhiyeva :



…or Olympic bomber Eric Rudolph :



…or Belgian suicide bomber Muriel Degauque :



…or alleged al Qaeda members with normal-sounding (to Western ears) names like Richard Reid and Jose Padilla?

Concentrating on superficial details like skin color and gender doesn’t help when you’re at war with an ideology or a tactic or whatever the hell the “war on terra” is supposed to be. I know the indignity of taking off your shoes at the airport has fueled your dream of replacing metal detectors with a “paper bag test”, but racial profiling doesn’t work. You may get a false sense of security, but trying to justify your own racism by scrutinizing those who fit your stereotype of what sort of person constitutes a threat isn’t just offensive, it’s counter-productive. Not only does racial profiling have the side-effect of making it easier for non-brown dudes to skip through the system, but it also can alienate many of our allies whose support we need if we’re ever going to catch Osama Bin Laden and his million or so second-in-commands.

Iraq took a lethal step closer to disintegration and civil war yesterday after a devastating attack on one of the country’s holiest sites. The destruction of the golden-domed Shia shrine in Samarra sparked a round of bloody sectarian retaliation in which up to 60 Sunni mosques were attacked and scores of people were killed or injured.

The bomb attack has enraged the majority Shia population, who regard the shrine in the same way that Roman Catholics view St Peter’s in Rome.

In a number of respects civil war in Iraq has already begun. Many of the thousand bodies a month arriving in the morgues in Baghdad are of people killed for sectarian reasons. It is no longer safe for members of the three main communities ­ the Sunni and Shia Arabs and the Kurds ­ to visit each other’s parts of the country.

- The Independent

“January 2003 the President invited three members of the Iraqi opposition to join him to watch the Super Bowl. In the course of the conversation the Iraqis realized that the President was not aware that there was a difference between Sunni and Shiite Muslims. He looked at them and said, ‘You mean…they’re not, you know, there, there’s this difference. What is it about?’”

- former U.S. dilpomat Peter Galbraith

A day after President Bush forcefully defended the pending sale of some of our ports to a country whose royal family literally hangs out with Osama Bin Laden, the White House is pulling the Corky Defense (via Kos) :

President Bush was unaware of the pending sale of shipping operations at six major U.S. seaports to a state-owned business in the United Arab Emirates until the deal already had been approved by his administration, the White House said Wednesday.

For dedicated Bush-watchers, the “he’s too retarded to know what he’s saying” defense is a very familiar tactic. Here’s how I described “The Corky Defense” almost three years ago :

Bush said his tax cuts would help everybody, but it turns out he’s screwing the poor. Bush said he knows for a fact that Saddam Hussein tried to get uranium from Africa, but it was known for almost a year that the evidence was forged. Bush’s buddy Ken Lay rips off investors for billions, but when asked about him, Bush suddenly turns into St. Peter and pretends he doesn’t even know him. Bush said that there are links between Iraq and al Qaeda, but the CIA concluded that there aren’t any. There were numerous prior warning about 9/11, but Bush didn’t get them and he didn’t remember the numerous warnings he’d beeen briefed on about terrorists hijacking planes into buildings.

In all these cases, all he had to do was invoke The Corky Defense and any allegations of wrongdoing and negligence went away. I guess this shouldn’t be a suprise to anyone though. Back in the 2000 election, one of the biggest defenses of Bush’s clear mental inferiority to Al Gore was “Well, he may not be that bright, but he’s surrounding himself with bright people. He’s got Colin Powell!” It was clear then that Bush wasn’t exactly the micromanager type.

What Bush doesn’t seem to realize is that being a leader isn’t just about delegating authority, but accepting responsibility for mistakes made within your oganization. Sorry George, but saying “I don’t know” doesn’t cut it. Knowing what the hell you’re talking about is one of the minimum requirements of the presidency and if you can’t even handle that, then maybe you shouldn’t be in charge anymore.

This kind of ignorance is typical of the guy who didn’t know how bad Hurricane Katrina was until some interns burned him a DVD of news coverage. I’m willing to concede that Bush probably didn’t know much about this deal last week, but when it shows up on the front page of every major newspaper, you’d think he’d start asking a few questions. Bush has been able to avoid responsibility for his own mistakes again and again by playing dumb and blaming his subordinates, but even in the best possible circumstances a real leader would make sure he knew what was going on before opening his mouth.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, John McCain is a phony. Of course, getting the public to see through McCain’s carefully-constructed persona is difficult when the media is so complicit in enforcing the view that he’s a no-nonsense, straight-talking tough guy who’s willing to reach across the aisle to do the right thing. Or as the “journalists” at CNN like to put it….

John King :

“McCain’s maverick streak doesn’t sit well with many colleagues.”

Bill Hemmer :

“The story of his life is a profile in courage, both political and personal. Before John McCain was a maverick senator, he was a Vietnam prisoner of war for six years in Hanoi.”

John King :

” Senator McCain known as a maverick, known as someone to challenge his party…he is now going back to the United States Senate, where he won the maverick label, the maverick reputation because his own party’s leadership back in the Senate is very much opposed to the very things John McCain stands for.

Kate Snow :
“Senator McCain known as a maverick here on Capitol Hill.”

Larry King :

“Tonight, personal revelations from a congressional maverick and an American hero. Senator McCain”

Candy Crowley :
“John McCain, the scrappy maverick who has defied his party and the odds”

Joe Johns :
“John McCain, the maverick conservative who has no problem crossing his party and his president when he thinks he’s right. ”

Anderson Cooper :

“John McCain, the Senator from Arizona, is a maverick, but a maverick with a following.”

Jeff Greenfield :

“John McCain is not a moderate, he’s a maverick.”
Candy Crowley :

“John McCain, a conservative, but a maverick conservative”

Carlos Watson :

“[O]n issues like homeland security you may see people like John McCain, the maverick senator from Arizona, be kind of a big champion”

Anderson Cooper :

“He, of course, a staunch supporter of the war in Iraq, also known for being a maverick within his own party. ”

Stephen Frazier :

“Interesting, now, how significant he will become, since he is a moderate and a maverick Republican.”

Suzanne Malveaux :

“Now, a familiar face that you’re also going to see on the trail is senator — this is Senator John McCain. He, of course, the maverick Republican trying to generate a lot of support there.”

Chris Black :

“Then there is the X factor, the maverick Republican John McCain determined to change the rules on political money as soon as next Monday in defiance of his own leaders.”

Kelly Wallace :

“A well-known getting the most votes within the Kerry campaign is Republican Senator John McCain. The Arizona maverick would generate tremendous excitement and help attract Republican and independent voters”

Wolf Blitzer :

“McCain is not campaigning there. For the maverick senator, the real challenge…”

Bill Schneider :

“John McCain managed to have it both ways — a principled maverick who remained Bush-friendly and kept lines open to conservatives.”

Lou Waters :

“In Washington, fellow Senate maverick John McCain angrily warned the Republican Party to, in his words, ‘grow up and learn to disagree without resorting to personal threats.’”

Wolf Blitzer :

“Eyebrows have been raised by a planned weekend meeting at the Arizona ranch of maverick Republican Senator John McCain.”

Suzanne Malveaux :

“It’s one of the main reasons why they picked Senator McCain to be a part of it, because you know he’s a critic, he’s a maverick, he’ll say what he wants to say.”

Joe Johns :

“Now, McCain, John McCain of Arizona, a key Republican here on Capitol
Hill, obviously a maverick Republican as well…”

Judy Woodruff :

“Senator John McCain is blasting what he calls crony capitalism. Up next: excerpts from McCain’s latest campaign against the system. Is he trying to sound like Teddy Roosevelt? Another political maverick is back in the spotlight…”

…and my favorite :

Howard Kurtz :

“Did the press pump up the story that the Arizona senator might — might — leave the GOP? Were journalists blatantly used by McCain advisers or can they simply not resist writing about their favorite maverick senator?”

Even when they’re questioning McCain, they can’t help but point out how tough he is. Of course, if McCain was an actual “maverick” he wouldn’t have waited until after an election year to talk tough on torture. I guess in media-land, “maverick” is defined as the first Republican to jump on a Democratic bandwagon. Nevermind what liberals say, the media likes to save their praise until McCain’s pollsters tells him to “reach across the aisle”. Blech.

My mom just emailed me this creepy photohop job with the subject line “You’ll shoot your eye out” :

What’s really weird is that the first thing that popped into my head was gay Satan’s mini-me from that Jesus snuff film whose name we mustn’t mention :



My apologies to anyone who’s freaked out by this post.