Capitalist Gaming For The Jaded
This one will have you checking your calendars to see if it’s April 1st (via Kottke) :
Monopoly board game players can now pay for properties with debit cards.Game makers Parker have phased out the standard multi-coloured cash in a new version.
Players will instead use a Visa mock debit card to keep track of how much they win or lose.
It is inserted into an electronic machine where the banker taps in cardholders’ earnings and payments.
Parker said replacing of cash with plastic showed the game was moving with the times.
Spokesman Chris Weatherhead said: “The new electronic Monopoly reflects the changing nature of society and the advancement of technology.”
If they want to modernize Monopoly, why stop there? They should make the properties increase in value quickly so that anyone who doesn’t purchase the property early rounds will never be able to afford anything. The richest player at any given point in the game will be be able to buy his/her way out of jail, while the poorest has to spend twice as long in jail as any other player. Get rid of Community Chest, Free Parking, and Luxury Tax, since they’re just outdated relics of an era in which people cared more for their society than their wallets. And the person who buys the utilities should be allowed to change the rules at any point during the game to ensure they always win. That’s how it seems to work in the real world.
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At random intervals, all improvements to Boardwalk and St. James place are destroyed.
The player choosing the automobile collects 200 dollars, then pays 200 dollars to free parking.
Comment by mdhatter — July 25, 2006 @ 7:01 pm
They should make the properties increase in value quickly so that anyone who doesn’t purchase the property early rounds will never be able to afford anything.
HA! He laughs the bitter, bitter laugh of living in San Francisco.
How about if your property is destroyed by a natural disaster and it is a hotel you get a no-interest loan to rebuild, if you only have a house you move to the center of the board for the rest of the game.
Comment by spocko — July 25, 2006 @ 11:43 pm
What next? Modernize “Operation” so that you submit the proposed procedure to an HMO, and THEY’LL tell you whether or not you can play?
Comment by Chris — July 26, 2006 @ 7:07 am
Christ. You’d think Monopoly would at least go through a check-writing phase.
That’s what people in the so-called Express line at the local supermarket always seem to do when they need that precious pack of chewing gum.
Comment by murgatroyd — July 26, 2006 @ 11:01 am
Whoever owns the Utility Companies gets to invade Candy Land and search for weapons of mass destruction.
Comment by Kamachanda — July 26, 2006 @ 1:46 pm
I hate to get in the way of a good rant, but I happen to think that the reason Monopoly is switching to debit cards is more prosaic. People are getting too stupid and lazy to add and subtract the fake cash.
Comment by Another_Chris — July 26, 2006 @ 8:22 pm
I can relate - I live near Washington, DC.
Comment by Ben in VA — July 27, 2006 @ 6:08 am
Whoever owns the Utility Companies gets to invade Candy Land and search for weapons of mass destruction.
ROTFLMAO!
Comment by Mr Furious — July 27, 2006 @ 1:17 pm
I also believe in the generational inability to tender illegal tender
Comment by TS — July 28, 2006 @ 10:30 pm