This is Your Brain on Orange Alert
I really hate how 9/11 legitimized all sorts of paranoid dipshittery. It’s embarrassing enough that the people who make the rules think bringing a bottle of water to the airport is a security risk, but now it seems that it’s a crime to inadvertently frighten a bunch of fools :
Boston police say they have made in arrest in connection to the suspicious device scare that turned out to be a marketing ploy for a television cartoon. The Peter Berdvosky was arrested in Arlington Wednesday night and charged under a recently enacted statute making it a crime to place a hoax device that results in panic.The scare forced bomb units to scramble across Boston all day. The “devices” were actually magnetic lights which resemble a character on the show “Aqua Teen Hunger Force”, on Turner Broadcasting’s Cartoon Network.
. . .
The suspicious device reports forced the temporary shutdowns of Interstate 93 out of the city, a key inbound roadway, a bridge between Boston and Cambridge, and a portion of the Charles River but were quickly determined not to be explosive.“It’s a hoax — and it’s not funny,” Gov. Deval Patrick said.
With all the loaded language, you’d almost think this guy did something wrong. After all, this “device” was a “hoax” that “forced” the Keystone Cops to chase each other in circles while waving their tiny baseball bats at each other. Throw this guy in jail because we all know this kind of panic isn’t the fault of the people who overreact to anything they consider weird.
Here’s what the “devices” looked like that caused everyone in Boston to pee themselves :
If they can’t tell the difference between a bomb and a Lite-Brite giving the finger, then we’re all screwed. God forbid these guys ever find an LED clock counting backwards, they’d have to declare martial law. After all, everyone knows that terrorists always go to the extra trouble of installing a visible timer into their explosive devices to ramp up the tension.
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…cute picture.
Our under-funded, over-worked emergency response system at work.
Yikes.
Comment by Darryl Pearce — February 1, 2007 @ 8:49 am
I hope everyone can see this, because I’m doing it really hard.
Your civil rights are now ours by way of our actions.
Comment by Ben in VA — February 1, 2007 @ 9:08 am
“The explosion shall be of extraordinary magnitude. Just hang on.” – Ignignokt
Comment by Chris V — February 1, 2007 @ 9:51 am
Right, some folks put a bunch of “Lite Brites” around the city on things like bridges, subway stations, traffic tunnels, etc., obviously designed to look suspicious, and it’s law enforcement’s fault that they, in fact DID look suspicious. Sorry, I don’t think the marketing guys get a free pass on this.
Comment by Curtin — February 1, 2007 @ 10:51 am
Curtin, how can I phrase this?
You’re a dumbass.
These things were a foot square. With (in the case of Ignignokt) 185 10mm LEDs on the front.
185 BRIGHTLY GLOWING LEDs.
All forming a figure giving you The Finger!
If that’s your definition of “obviously designed to look suspicious“, you have a successful career waiting for you in the DHS.
Here’s a link to a picture of the “bomb” in question:
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/104/376141616_6183ece65e_o.jpg
I live in Boston. The massive over-reaction from the dumbasses in office has been wonderfully entertaining.
Comment by Chris Tucker — February 1, 2007 @ 11:09 am
This one had me yelling at my radio during my commute. Sounds like a collection of trigger happy twits over reacted and now they have to play the drama out to it’s sad end or suffer admitting their obscene lack-of-a-clue. 10 cities have these signs posted and only Boston flips out?! Secondly this is the antithesis of a hoax, it’s an advertising promotion, the “devices” are signs not bombs. They are made to be noticed and recognized, not hide from view, undetectable until they “go off.” Utterly mind-boggling that the first, first-responder didn’t pull the plug on all the hysteria, but I guess by then it was too late. This did happen in the state famous for the witch hunt, so I shouldn’t be too surprised I guess.
Comment by Kurt — February 1, 2007 @ 11:11 am
I wish I had found one. It could pay for a trip I have coming up:
Ebay
Comment by RT — February 1, 2007 @ 12:25 pm
“Curtin, how can I phrase this?
You’re a dumbass.”
Wow, and I was so going to give you my class ring.
I know how big they are, I know what they looked like, up close. When you see a package with duct tape and wires and batteries stuck to a highway on ramp, you’re first reaction is not going to be “What a cool promotion for Aqua Teen Hunger Force!” You can Monday morning quarterback this all you want, but this was not Menino’s fault.
Comment by Curtin — February 1, 2007 @ 12:51 pm
Honestly – everyone looks at this like its the police jumping the gun, but you seem to forget that the first device was found during daylight (no ‘Brite-lit’ action) under a bridge – a square with batteries and wires hanging off of it.
Plain and simple this is marketing taken too far – is no space safe from ad invasion? Do they get a pass because its ‘art school students’? These are public spaces and as such you need permission to place things there – this is just a bunch of hipster ad execs trying to ‘break through the clutter’ and guess what, it blew up in their face. Plain and simple.
Was the Boston reaction over the top? Yes, it definitely was. But how should they react? If something had blown up, everyone would be calling Boston a bunch of fools for not treating every device like it was a bomb. Turner/the ad company should have alerted the city.
Comment by Dave — February 1, 2007 @ 2:35 pm
“God forbid these guys ever find an LED clock counting backwards, they’d have to declare martial law.”
Oh my God! Supose they see my Bush countdown keychain! Next time I go to a club in Cambridge, I’m leaving Bushie home.
OK, I don’t blame them too much for being careful, but I do have a problem with the arrests. These guys just did a job for a company hired by a very big, very respectable mainstream corporation. They put up devices a couple of weeks ago which hung around with nobody worrying about them. Several other cities which had identical devices also didn’t seem to care. Then, suddenly, everybody feels threatened and Boston goes nuts. Apparently the “suspects” are guilty of not being clairvoyant enough to know that the authorities (considerably after the fact) would find cartoony lite-bright toys scary.
Comment by marie — February 1, 2007 @ 2:42 pm
I’m just surprised that no one in Boston, not one of them, had ever seen the show.
I mean, I’m afraid of Jim J Bullock, but not bomb-scare afraid.
And if they want to get all upset when they thought they were bombs, fine. But now that they know what’s going on and it’s clear that they both overreacted and are completely out of touch with popular culture, maybe it’s time to stop with calling marketers “terror suspects.”
Comment by Dr. Pants — February 1, 2007 @ 3:01 pm
Don’t judge them for being ‘completely out of touch with popular culture’. They are public servants, not hipster college students. I work for a large public school system in MA & I bet 99% of the people I work with wouldn’t have gotten the reference – and they work with kids and the like…
Comment by Dave — February 1, 2007 @ 3:11 pm
@ Ben in VA
Not sure what you meant, but you make it sound like my civil rights have been taken away somehow. How is that exactly? What rights? The rights of mega-huge companies to co-opt public space for their own personal gain? If so, then take it – its yours!
Comment by Dave — February 1, 2007 @ 3:13 pm
But, but that’s how they all do it in the Bond movies.
Comment by rj — February 1, 2007 @ 3:56 pm
When you see a package with duct tape and wires and batteries stuck to a highway on ramp, you’re first reaction is not going to be “What a cool promotion for Aqua Teen Hunger Force!”
You’re right; my first thought would be, “Oh my God, the terrorists are going to blow up the bridge with an Adult Swim cartoon character bomb!”
Comment by Chris V — February 1, 2007 @ 4:03 pm
Of course, al Qaeda wouldn’t bother with the symbolic “f*** you” image. But what about the Unabomber, or the “smiley-face” mail bombing moron of a couple years ago, or the anthrax letter sender? A lot of home-grown terrorists seem more motivated in sending a message or getting noticed than in actually being effective at killing lots of people.
I’m with Curtin and Dave on this one — including the concessions that, yeah, still, even so, there’s been a little too much made of this by all involved. It wasn’t the next 9/11, but it did deserve to be taken seriously.
Comment by Whistler Blue — February 1, 2007 @ 4:14 pm
I know how big they are, I know what they looked like, up close. When you see a package with duct tape and wires and batteries stuck to a highway on ramp, you’re first reaction is not going to be “What a cool promotion for Aqua Teen Hunger Force!” You can Monday morning quarterback this all you want, but this was not Menino’s fault.
Posted by Curtin at February 1, 2007 12:51 PM
Sure, they saw some devices that might be suspicious and took them down. It’s a misunderstanding, but good job, police, for being on the ball on this.
But then we find out that the signs have been up for two or three weeks, and the police just now noticed.
And now we find out that even though the mayor knows that it’s a marketing campaign gone wrong, he’s decided to act like he’s captured Osama bin Ladin and throw the book at the guys. The mayor and the police chief are all over FOX News trying to act like they responded appropriately, trying to save face by scapegoating the two guys they caught.
Comment by Scott — February 1, 2007 @ 4:57 pm
I’m glad to see that private citizens can still be scapegoated for the government’s ineptitude.
I like, especially, that they’re being prosecuted under a bizarre, recently-enacted statute. What is this? The Seinfeld finale?
Just imagine how much more drastic the response would have been if the authorities had been able to appreciate the sheer power of their Mooninite enemy.
Durr.
Comment by Baked Bean — February 1, 2007 @ 6:12 pm
I don’t know if I think the two stoner “Performance Artists” should get strubg up for this, but how can you fault the bomb squad for taking this seriously? IT’S THEIR GODDAMNED JOB. And nobody mentions the fact that, on the very same day, two very real looking pipebombs were also found in the city, one of them attached to the bridge that connects Boston and Cmbridge (you know, where the people with the thinky heads live). I don’t think it’s out of the realm of possibility that someone’s going to take these things seriously.
Comment by Curtin — February 1, 2007 @ 6:20 pm
Okay, I’ll mention it.
Hey guys, did you hear that the Boston police sent the bomb squad to detonate two fake pipe bombs? Did you also hear that they have a suspect who “has been identified but has not been charged”? Maybe the pipe bombs weren’t cartoony enough to warrant an arrest.
Comment by greg — February 1, 2007 @ 9:09 pm
Or maybe the suspect didn’t post video of himself placing the fake bombs around. So maybe they have to get more evidence about this suspect because he wasn’t dumb enough to brag about it on the internet.
Comment by Curtin — February 2, 2007 @ 4:48 am
“Honestly – everyone looks at this like its the police jumping the gun, but you seem to forget that the first device was found during daylight (no ‘Brite-lit’ action) under a bridge – a square with batteries and wires hanging off of it.”
and in the case of Ignignokt, 185 white LEDs, each one 10mm in diameter, (10mm is not quite a half inch) on a black background, in the shape of a figure giving you The Finger.
You can spin all you want. You can spin until you get dizzy, fall over and puke all over yourself.
These things were not the least bit suspicious to the average person, who walked/drove past them for nigh onto THREE WEEKS.
For the credulous morons in the local government, however, well, they are the equivilent of the fellow who sat on a whoopie cushion, and is now looking for someone to punch in the nose because they were made to look rediculous.
“It had a very sinister appearance,”
So does Dick Cheney.
[Massachusetts Attorney General Martha] Coakley told reporters. “It had a battery behind it, and wires.”
So does Dick Cheney’s heart.
Does this mean that we can get the Boston Bomb Squad to blow up Dick Cheney?
Comment by Chris Tucker — February 3, 2007 @ 10:38 am
My post was a little oblique. I just meant that we won’t have any civil liberties if authorities are allowed to overreact like this. It’s not the big corporation I care about, and I do sympathize with the whole co-opting of public space, but I also feel like we’ve lost that particular battle. Advertisements for all kinds of products and services litter the landscape, and they’re not pretty or useful, even if they’re ironic and hip; however, they’re not terrorizing us. And yes, I will defend their right to advertise like anyone else, or at least to be free from prosecution for this ridiculous debacle. It was not a “hoax,” it was an advertisement. It was not a “device,” it was a billboard. We can “what if” all day, but if we take that route, then any package or any billboard, or anything at all can be considered dangerous. It’s the government’s responsiblity to respond to these situations quickly and effectively; in this case, it’s clear they did neither.
Comment by Ben in VA — February 5, 2007 @ 1:07 pm
you think that was an overreaction? try giving someone the finger in Boston.
Comment by mdhatter — February 9, 2007 @ 1:34 am