Here’s a shocking display of honesty from the conservative blog Powerline :

We conservatives have had a good time ridiculing the Obama phenomenon, especially its messianic feel — the willingness of its adherents to pour so much hope and belief into such an empty, or at least incomplete, vessel — and its elevation of “narrative” over substance.

It turns out that we were dying to have basically the same experience.

Indeed. The Republicans have been desperate for a conservative savior for a while now. In fact, the desire to find the next Reagan pretty much defines the entire GOP presidential campaign.

In early 2007, the front-runners for the GOP nomination were Rudy Giuliani and John McCain, but those were both deemed non-starters by the Republican base. John McCain is a sanctimonious twit who conservatives can’t stand much the same way that Democrats hate Lieberman. Rudy excites the base with his 9/11-tourette’s, but he’s a serial adulterer who doesn’t hate gay people enough to excite the religious wing who still operate under the quaint notion that they’re the ones in charge of the Republican party. Faced with that dreadful choice and knowing that the Bush legacy was a surefire loser in 2008, the GOP began their search for the person who would save their party from another humiliating defeat.

First up to the bat was Mitt Romney, who seemed almost as if he was designed to be a Republican politician. A generically handsome governor/billionaire who wears his religion on his sleeve, what’s not to like? Well, the fact that he’s from Taxachussets and has a history of pandering to liberals, for one. At least, that was enough to help Republicans to justify the real reason for opposing him, which is that he’s a Mormon. The religious right is all about religious freedom when it comes to their own religion, but they’ll be damned if they give their vote to somebody who wears the magic underwear.

Okay, how about former Senator Fred Thompson of TV’s Law and Order? He’s an actor, like Reagan! Plus, he’s got that condescending southern drawl that voters find irresistible. On paper it seemed perfect, since the only thing Republicans love more than railing against celebrities is voting for them. Unfortunately for them, Thompson couldn’t pull off the biggest challenge of his career, acting like he wanted to be president. Huh? You want me to campaign on the weekends too?

Then, out of the Iowa caucuses came a dark horse candidate, former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee. Finally a guy who the Republicans can sink their teeth into. He’s funny, he talks about Jesus all the time, and he used to be fat. Unfortunately for the Huckster, when the Republican party bosses started paying attention to his record, they were struck with paralyzing fear. “Oh no, he really means this ‘compassion for the poor’ crap.” Needless to say, when faced with the choice between compassionate conservatism and lower taxes, Republicans always choose the latter.

And so, with the primaries underway, the pendulum of Republican opinion swung back to John McCain by default. Though it seemed like a race for a while between McCain, Romney, and Huckabee, the winner-takes-all nature of the GOP primaries sealed the deal for our nation’s least humble POW on Super Tuesday. And with that, Republicans across the country woke up in a cold sweat on the morning of February 6th thinking “Oh shit! We just nominated John McCain.”

Though they may be loathe to admit it, that’s pretty much been the thought in the backs of the minds of conservatives everywhere for the past seven months. The preferred euphemism is “enthusiasm” gap, but it really sugar coats the fact that Republicans seemed lost and had resigned themselves to the fact that their nominee was somebody they couldn’t stand. That is, until John McCain gave them their next conservative messiah, Sarah “Barracuda” Palin.

She’s a regular lady, they boast to themselves, not like those minorities and city-dwellers in the DemocRAT party. She eats moose and calls her husband “dude”, what wonderful nuggets of authenticity that look great in a campaign ad! Plus, she’s so damn religious that we get all of the positives of supporting women without having to change our views in ways that would actually, y’know, support women.

Which is where we are now. The Republicans have found a new crush, “the one” who will save their party and usher in a new era of conservatism. Once the glory of her gloriously sarcastic convention speech has faded, they’ll start finding reasons to dislike her just as they have every other conservative standard-bearer. Will her tax-raising ways, Which have drawn comparisons to GOP-bogeyman Hugo Chavez, prompt the oilmen who own the GOP to force her out? Or will the fundies get scared off by her knocked-up kid and the tabloid innuendo that surrounds her? Or will the GOP base start rejecting her when they realize that she’s just the more-likable frontwoman for that saddest of sacks, John McCain?

Either way, if recent history is any guide, the honeymoon won’t last forever. Hell, I doubt it’ll last until election day.

I know that John McCain doesn’t understand the internets, but isn’t it a little strange that the “Women for McCain” page on his campaign site doesn’t include any mention of Sarah Palin? If the GOP was so concerned about appealing to women, you’d think that their women’s outreach site would have been updated at least once in the last couple of months.

In tonight’s speech, John McCain used a line I’ve heard him use more than once on the stump :

I’ve fought the big spenders in both parties, who waste your money on things you neither need nor want, and the first big-spending pork-barrel earmark bill that comes across my desk, I will veto it. I will make them famous, and you will know their names. You will know their names.

He’s already lived up to half of his promise :

I’m not sure if introducing the country to Porky Palin and her federal money-addicted town is exactly what he had in mind though.

As “jumped the shark” applies to television and “nuked the fridge” applies to movies, lemme just say that, in the realm of politics, the Republican National Convention really “earned the desk” last night :

Why is it that the GOP seems to think that American elections should all just be a giant veteran-fluffing competition? You know how I like to honor the military? By trying to keep our soldiers (which includes my step-brother who’s currently in Iraq) from being murdered by Iraqi extremists and by reuniting them with their families.

Sarah Palin, tonight :

“Here’s how I look at the choice Americans face in this election. In politics, there are some candidates who use change to promote their careers. And then there are those, like John McCain, who use their careers to promote change.”

Mystery Men :

Mr. Furious: Okay, am I the only one who finds these sayings just a little bit formulaic? “If you want to push something down, you have to pull it up. If you want to go left, you have to go right.” It’s…

The Sphinx: Your temper is very quick, my friend. But until you learn to master your rage…

Mr. Furious: …your rage will become your master? That’s what you were going to say. Right? Right?

The Sphinx: Not necessarily.

After a few days of nonstop Palinmania, I think it’s worth summing up what John McCain’s pick of Sarah Palin for VP says about his campaign as a whole. While none of this is really unique, I think it’s helpful to take a step back and try to reflect on the enormity of this screw-up.

John McCain is a hypocrite and a liar - For the last few months, the McCain campaign has tried to hammer home the point that Barack Obama’s lack of experience was dangerous and that we couldn’t afford to take that sort of risk when we’re at war. If he was sincere about that concern, then there’s no excuse for picking someone with as little experience as Palin (esp. when there are scores of Republicans of either gender more qualified). The fact that the campaign is now comparing her minimal experience favorably to Obama’s just adds an ironic twist. The fact that the McCain is willing to risk throwing this country into the hands of a neophyte just proves that he never really believed his own bullshit.

The Republican base are a bunch of mindless sheep - The glee with which conservatives were quick in welcoming Palin is bizarre. She’s a religious woman from Alaska who McCain says is a “reformer”. Well, if John McCain vouches for her, then that’s good enough for them. The base didn’t know much about her because John McCain didn’t know much about her. And now that the press is doing the job of figuring out who the heck this person is that might accidentally become the most powerful person on Earth, they’re quick to regurgitate the new talking points (The press is hostile, sexist). I’d love to see how many of these McCain supporters would answer in the affirmative to this question : “If John McCain died today, should the GOP nominate Sarah Palin to be their Presidential candidate?”

The McCain campaign is politically inept - Most of the more embarrassing revelations from the past week could have been anticipated early if the McCain campaign had been smart and done what the Obama campaign did with its VP rollout, which is float a series of trial-balloons and see how the press and base react. They seem to have done this with other candidates, just not Palin. Granted, a fake leak would spoil the element of surprise, but it would also spare them the cover of Us Weekly. Another glaring oversight is the fact that the McCain team is still pathetically underprepared to defend Palin’s record. A competent vetting team would have a list of possible complaints about Palin ready on the day of her announcement and carefully worded talking points for each one ready to disseminate to the press. Instead, they’ve spent the last few days in bunker mode, keeping their VP candidate away from interviewers and declaring that they aren’t going to answer any more questions about their “thorough” vetting process.

John McCain is irresponsible - There’s a reason you keep hearing the phrase “heartbeat away from the presidency” over and over. The VP choice is not one to be taken lightly, yet it seems that John McCain chose Sarah Palin on a whim without taking the opportunity to get to know her in depth and figure out what sort of president she might be. In the most important choice a presidential candidate can make, John McCain showed himself to be lazy and impulsive.

John McCain is an asshole - After everything else mentioned above, he still has the gall to push the “Country First” theme? What a dick.

Joe Lieberman last night :

“God only made one John McCain”

Oh really?

HowManyOfMe.com

There are 451 people with the name John Mccain in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

Of course, if by “John McCain” he meant “war-mongering faux-centrist who makes important decisions without thinking”, I think the number will be a lot higher than 451. In fact, I think those people are having a convention right now in St. Paul.

You know John McCain is in trouble when the celebrity rags start following the aftermath of Hurricane Palin :

The article itself may not contain any new information, but that headline is a killer. Ouch.

For the past few days, journalists and bloggers have been making the point that the steady stream of embarrassing revelations about Sarah Palin indicates that the McCain campaign did a half-assed job of vetting Palin. In their defense, McCain advisers have repeatedly insisted that Palin was “thoroughly vetted”, but doesn’t that just make things worse? I know it’s politically damaging that John McCain picked someone he barely knows to be a heartbeat away from the presidency, but isn’t that better than the alternative, that McCain’s campaign did all the research they could think to do and did a really crappy job of it? Or to put things another way, are we supposed to be comforted by the notion that McCain isn’t risky and lazy, but merely foolish and incompetent?

Hey Mom, former OB-GYN, can you take a look at this post and chime in with what you think in the comments? It makes a pretty compelling case that Sarah Palin isn’t actually the mother of her fifth child, but I’ll defer to you on this one.